Why does his mother regret allowing him to attend boarding school?
Chang-rae Lee was somewhat of a home body. He enjoyed his time at home, and from reading the story, he was very particular of his Mother. In the beginnining of the story, Lee says his mother sent him away to school to change his character; so he wouldn't end up like her. As a child, it was easy to see that Lee was taking on the characteristics of his Mother, he loved to watch her cook, he would even sneak into the kitchen to watch her instead of playing with friends. Going away to Exeter only made him grow apart from his mother, realize that she did nothing except stay confined within the four walls of the house, and forced him to take on the world, which he wasn't prepared for. Later in her life , sending him off to school comes back to haunt Lee's mother, because she realizes sending him away didn't change his character at all, it just made it so she had less time with him, time to teach him the things she thought were important, and that she had less of an impact on the end result of the person he became.
Lee's mother was disappointed that she hadn't taught him to cook as well as she could have. When she became sick, she knew that Lee would be the one to make the meals that would bring the family together for dinner, and she expects the food that they come together for to be perfect. But this won't happen because Lee was sent away to school for 9 years, 9 years that his Mother knew could have been spent at home by her side, where he could've learned to make the dishes as perfect as she did. His mother feels like she not only grew apart from her only son while he was at Exeter, but also that she wasn't able to pass on the best skill that she felt she had, to make perfect Korean food for the family.
Hi Alex,
ReplyDeleteI like your point, "Later in her life , sending him off to school comes back to haunt Lee's mother, because she realizes sending him away didn't change his character at all, it just made it so she had less time with him, time to teach him the things she thought were important, and that she had less of an impact on the end result of the person he became."
I think you're right. She sends him away in order to change him, but in the time he's away, there are many lessons she still probably needed to teach him. She gave up the responsibility to educate him beyond formal schooling, and I imagine she regrets that.
Thanks for your insights.
Lauren
Hi Alex,
ReplyDeleteI do think she had less of an impact on the person Lee would become. Who knows how things would have been if he never left home and had not gone to Exeter; probably very different.
Hi Alex,
ReplyDeleteLee was very close to his mother and I am sure going off to school was not something they were both looking forward to do, due to them both being very close to each other. I like how you mentioned how “… she knew that Lee would be the one to make the meals that would bring the family together for dinner, and she expects the food that they come together for to be perfect.” Her knowing that she was becoming very ill, that she could no longer bring the family together but how Lee was the one that could take over her place and keep the family close together when meal time came around.
Hi Alex,
ReplyDeleteI think that most of us never want to think of the day we leave this would, and that's probable why she never imagine that after her son would finally come back home there would be not much time for them to spend together. I agree with you on how she probably regretted sending him away to change his character when what she really wanted was to spend more time with him.
Estela
I agree with you that she regretted sending him away to change him, when she really needed to spend more time with him and teach him new things. Seemed like she would've rather someone else teach him and give him the best education
ReplyDeleteHey Alex,
ReplyDeleteI think Lee's mother did regret the time that was lost between her and her son, but I also believe she couldn't have had it any other way. It seemed like that was her character to be self sacrificing. Lee makes it a point to talk about how she pretty much handled everything like accountant, housekeeper etc. I believe that she probably felt that she needed to let her son go live his own life and get out even though she knew her time was short.
We all hope to never be in that situatiion, but maybe if we were we would have done the same thing.
Thanks for your review